darkness or light

What a year.  A year of the valley.  Oh, how easy to give into the sadness and darkness, especially now that it's time for decking the halls and fa-la-la-la-la.

There are moments when I let the darkness overwhelm me, but then there are moments when I fight back and run toward the Light, choosing joy over sadness, choosing light over darkness.

I am with you always, even to the end of the age.  Matthew 28:20

The other night, with A Charlie Brown Christmas playing on repeat and Christmas decorations strewn everywhere, I was at the crossroads.  There it lay before me:  sink into the darkness of despair OR grab joy and run toward the Light.

The people walking in darkness have seen a great light; on those living in the land of the shadow of death, a light has dawned. Isaiah 9:2

 

Wavering between the two, I looked up and saw this:  

Joy it was.  Because of grace.

Glory to God in the Highest

Time, where did you go?

Pictures from Sam's first summer home......I am just not sure at what point in time this turned into 

THIS!!!!! 

A kindergartener already???

As we begin this new milestone, may this be practiced now & always: "The key is not in spending time, but in investing it." Stephen R. Covey

calling for help

{Months ago, I taught Sam his address, how to call 911, and what to do in an emergency.}

Yesterday, the neighbor's puppy found his way under our car tire, and little did we know that to Sam, this constituted an emergency.  A 911 kind of emergency.

After profusely apologizing to the deputy, reassuring Sam, and moving past the embarrassment that I felt for leaving out the "for people only"  did I hear the Holy Spirit whispering to my heart.

Sam saw an emergency and needed help.  He called the one number he knew that would send help.  There was no running around like Chicken Little.  No tears or panic.  He just went and got my phone to get help.  (I kinda wished there would have been some Chicken Little behavior, so I would have had a clue into his thoughts and prevented the call...)

When I am in a difficult situation and in need of help, I should do like Sam and calmly call on the One who can send that help.  Instead, I run around like Chicken Little making the situation worse or trying to fix things myself.  Only after failing at my own attempts do I call the One who promises the help that I need.

I like to think that I am teaching Sam all sorts of things--like what to do in an emergency.  Really though, God is using this child of mine to teach me all sorts of things.  God is using motherhood to hold a mirror up to my heart and show me more about myself and Him than I thought possible.  Thankfully, He is a gentle and patient teacher, all wise and all knowing.  He not only has hindsight but foresight that is 20/20.



Note:
The puppy looks like he will be okay after a week or so of taking it easy!

Sam now knows that 911 is for people emergencies only.

repost: 209 years of marriage

Since writing the post below 4 four years ago, only one of these precious couples are still together on this side of heaven.  Whether here on Earth or already in heaven, they remain shining examples to Jeremy and me of what "I do" really means.

209 years of marriage: an incredible feat

In a culture where marriage vows are discarded with surprising ease, we're thankful for those couples who have kept their commitments to one another, even when the storms of life surrounded them.  They are beautiful examples of what marriage should be like.  God has surrounded Jeremy and me with some of these couples, and we are so thankful He did!!

Lives of ease and comfort have not kept them together.  Actually, these couples have not had lives of ease or comfort; they have battled more than their share of storms--financial hardships, serious illnesses, job loss, economic downturns, the challenges that come with raising children, grief and loss of family members.  What keeps them together is the love and commitment they share with each other, and a rock solid faith in their Creator.

So, as we get ready to celebrate 9 years of marriage on Wednesday, we say THANK YOU to the One who created marriage and to those who live it out so well for us all!!

(My Uncle Dale and Aunt Linda eloped, so I don't have  an actual wedding picture. They were married  for 46 years until death parted them in 2007.  I know Aunt Linda is waiting in heaven for my Uncle Dale.)

cars and corsages

Mother's Day: a day of thanksgiving, celebrating, gift giving--and remembering.

When you're a little boy and it's Mother's Day, what do you give your mama?  You give her two of your favorite thing:  Hot Wheels :).  I think I have to share these....I probably should check on that...

Mother's Day corsages have gone the way of cord phones and dial up internet.  In my mind's eye though, they are still very much "a thing.". I remember my mama wearing one every year.  Thanks to some Pinspiration, I wore one this year--in memory of my mama, a woman who was a giant in the faith...faith that has now become sight.

 Most importantly, there was such grace poured out onto me this day.  Without His grace, I would have not been on two feet, much less smiling and laughing with my boy.  His goodness completely overwhelms me.

this boy

How blessed I am by this sweet boy and the tender heart  he has for his mama!

Not only does he melt my heart, he has me wrapped securely around one of the little fingers that are holding my "flower pile" together.

"Every good and perfect gift is from above..." James 1:17

To the Giver of every good gift, there will never be enough words to thank you.

three years home

This week we celebrated our 3rd Samiversary, marking three years our sweet boy has been home!

Enduring a wait of nearly three years, from home study to homecoming, makes pictures like this worth a thousand words and then some.

Happy Samiversary, sweet boy, you came into our lives, and everything changed.  You are my favorite boy and always will be!

set free from the lies that bind

The week started with Sam losing his first tooth and ended with me doing some early Spring cleaning--clearing out clothes that Sam had long since outgrown.  Both of these are evidence that we no longer have a toddler running around.  Prior to October, the very thought would have sent me into a tailspin because my plan was not working out in real life like it did in my head.

In my head, I thought we would adopt again--probably when Sam was around four.   The further we got from my plan, the more I started to believe it must be something to do with my mothering.  I started to believe that if I were just a better mom, God would give me more children; Sam would have siblings.  I just needed to do more, do better, and wait for God to send the siblings.   I did not stop to consider that I was believing a lie.

When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.  John 8:44

One normal Sunday, PK's sermon focused on Satan's lies that hold us captive and God's truths that set us free.  I remember him saying that he wanted broken chains to be left in the pews that day.  There were no fireworks or bells from heaven ringing audibly, but chains were broken from around my heart that day.  I had been believing the enemy's lie that I was unworthy--if only I was worthy enough as a mother, God would give us more children.  The truth dawned clear and bright:  the size of our family has nothing to do with worth and everything to do with God's plan for our family.  My motherhood and worth is no longer held captive by the chains of Satan's lies.

Then you will know the truth, and the truth shall set you free.   John 8:32

Over the past few months, this has proved itself by a settled peace in my heart and mind.  I have no idea if we'll ever adopt again, and I am completely okay with that.  Contentment resides alongside peace.

Peace I give to you... John 14:27

In this, God--in His grace---met a need that I did not even acknowledge or realize.

Now,  I find myself in a dark and difficult season, a season full of needs.  More needs than I can count or realize.  I go back to when God has met me exactly where I was, like that Sunday in October.  I am in a different situation, but He is the same God.  He will meet me here.

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.  Jeremiah 29:11