cars and corsages

Mother's Day: a day of thanksgiving, celebrating, gift giving--and remembering.

When you're a little boy and it's Mother's Day, what do you give your mama?  You give her two of your favorite thing:  Hot Wheels :).  I think I have to share these....I probably should check on that...

Mother's Day corsages have gone the way of cord phones and dial up internet.  In my mind's eye though, they are still very much "a thing.". I remember my mama wearing one every year.  Thanks to some Pinspiration, I wore one this year--in memory of my mama, a woman who was a giant in the faith...faith that has now become sight.

 Most importantly, there was such grace poured out onto me this day.  Without His grace, I would have not been on two feet, much less smiling and laughing with my boy.  His goodness completely overwhelms me.

this boy

How blessed I am by this sweet boy and the tender heart  he has for his mama!

Not only does he melt my heart, he has me wrapped securely around one of the little fingers that are holding my "flower pile" together.

"Every good and perfect gift is from above..." James 1:17

To the Giver of every good gift, there will never be enough words to thank you.

three years home

This week we celebrated our 3rd Samiversary, marking three years our sweet boy has been home!

Enduring a wait of nearly three years, from home study to homecoming, makes pictures like this worth a thousand words and then some.

Happy Samiversary, sweet boy, you came into our lives, and everything changed.  You are my favorite boy and always will be!

set free from the lies that bind

The week started with Sam losing his first tooth and ended with me doing some early Spring cleaning--clearing out clothes that Sam had long since outgrown.  Both of these are evidence that we no longer have a toddler running around.  Prior to October, the very thought would have sent me into a tailspin because my plan was not working out in real life like it did in my head.

In my head, I thought we would adopt again--probably when Sam was around four.   The further we got from my plan, the more I started to believe it must be something to do with my mothering.  I started to believe that if I were just a better mom, God would give me more children; Sam would have siblings.  I just needed to do more, do better, and wait for God to send the siblings.   I did not stop to consider that I was believing a lie.

When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.  John 8:44

One normal Sunday, PK's sermon focused on Satan's lies that hold us captive and God's truths that set us free.  I remember him saying that he wanted broken chains to be left in the pews that day.  There were no fireworks or bells from heaven ringing audibly, but chains were broken from around my heart that day.  I had been believing the enemy's lie that I was unworthy--if only I was worthy enough as a mother, God would give us more children.  The truth dawned clear and bright:  the size of our family has nothing to do with worth and everything to do with God's plan for our family.  My motherhood and worth is no longer held captive by the chains of Satan's lies.

Then you will know the truth, and the truth shall set you free.   John 8:32

Over the past few months, this has proved itself by a settled peace in my heart and mind.  I have no idea if we'll ever adopt again, and I am completely okay with that.  Contentment resides alongside peace.

Peace I give to you... John 14:27

In this, God--in His grace---met a need that I did not even acknowledge or realize.

Now,  I find myself in a dark and difficult season, a season full of needs.  More needs than I can count or realize.  I go back to when God has met me exactly where I was, like that Sunday in October.  I am in a different situation, but He is the same God.  He will meet me here.

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.  Jeremiah 29:11

sow---->reap

"If you sow a thought, you will reap an action.

If you sow an action, you will reap a habit.

If you sow a habit, you reap character.

If you sow character, you reap a destiny."

-John Stott

No matter the season of life, may I never miss a chance to sow seeds of truth and love into my sweet boy's tender heart.  It is my greatest purpose, my highest calling.

the best yard sale find

My journey to motherhood did not come easy.  A lot of it was spent waiting and wondering, hoping and praying that our house would one day be filled with toys and noise, that our yard would be a place of play and pretend.

Most days I am simply trying to keep up with a very busy four-year old, so I don't always stop and linger over how long the journey was or how God was so faithful through it all.  It took a $20 bike from a yard sale to cause me to stop, to linger, and to give thanks to the One who led us all the way.  Our house is now filled with toys and noise; our yard is the place where Nerf gun wars are fought and bikes are seen racing....yes, it was a longtime coming but worth every minute of the wait.

To God be the glory.

she is the reason.

Long before "Bible journaling" was a thing, my mother was doing it.

 Using a yellow highlighter and a Bic pen, she underlined, circled, and highlighted.  It was something she would do during a church service as she made note of something the preacher said; it was something she would do in the early morning Quiet Time she spent with her God as she read His Word.

She is the reason my Bible is marked up and written in.  She is the reason I know what a quiet time is.  She is the reason that I am grounded in a foundation of faith.   And, these are the reasons His Word marks my heart.

Tomorrow, while enjoying Mother's Day with my sweet boy, I will be thanking God for a mother who planted seeds of truth and faith in my heart, sowing a legacy of faith that has kept me moored in even the fiercest of life's storms.